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Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Posting This While Darling Husband Tends to the Crazed Offspring...

Is it just me? Am I the only person I know with kids so hyper, I can't get a damn thing done when I'm at home? I try to cook, one of them throws herself off the sofa. I try to do college work, one of them is hanging off my leg, wailing. I try to get WORK work done, and I have similar results. I try to feed the pets, the one year old is "helpfully" digging cat poos out of the kitty litter, catapulting (no pun intended) kitty litter pellets all over the place. I try exercising and the floor workouts just invite them to sit on me or else try to imitate me, falling on top of me in the process. I try to clean, and they decide the best toy in the world are my vaguely toxic cleaning supplies. Neither of them sat in high chairs for more than a few minutes, neither sat in a play pen without whining to be picked up again within two minutes (tops), and yet somehow I have friends who are also mothers who still cook, get to clean their houses, and have social lives. Okay, I didn't have the social life prior to having kids, so I don't know why I'm fooling myself I can regain something I never had...

Holy shit. I just realized I'd buttoned my pajamas all wrong... That comes from my rushing to get dressed with my one year old screaming at my legs.

Does our daycare give my kids crack as retaliation from some mysterious offence I have caused them?

Actually, my kids are pretty damned amazing. As long as they have my completely undivided attention... Otherwise I'm THIS close to getting the full Home Alone criminal treatment. I guess I'll just enjoy this time while they still want "mommy" around, eh?

On a side note, Ricky Gervais is as awesome as ever. He has made it to my unlikely celebrity shag list.

1 comment:

calencoriel said...

I remember all of that...when I would try to empty the dishwasher, the knives had to be the first to be put away or else who knows how many vessels would have been severed.

I remember going to the grocery with both of them and parking right next to a cart corral so that I could put them into the grocery carts directly from the car so neither dashed out into oncoming traffic.

I would make "drums" out of mixing bowls and saran wrap and give the boy a wooden spoon to occupy him while I put something together for dinner.

It would last about 3 minutes.

It died down a bit when they were 5 and 3...I was able to accomplish things outside of nap time at that point.

If it helps, as teens they sleep till noon and rarely move unless engaged in a team sport of some type.

I hate to say it, but TV helped. Arthur and Big Comfy Couch and Little Bear would calm them down. Thank God for PBS.

Hang in there...