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Thursday, June 25, 2009

Flashbacks of the Fecal Kind

It's funny starting all over again. The late night feedings, the weird evolution of the poo (resulting in rolicking games of "Guess What Color the Poo is Now?"), trying to remember to take fifty-billion things along with us even on the "simplest" of outings... But it really is the diaper experience which really brings back some fond memories of the first time I went through all this.

I recall with particular fondness the 2am feeding and diaper change which resulted in my daughter projecting a glob of yellow poo at least two and a half feet onto the carpet before I was able to get the second diaper positioned in time. I am pretty proud to say I wasn't upset, so much as frantic to get the stain up before it set in. I have since adopted the Speedy Switch technique to avoid repeats.

Another highlight of my diaper career involved the time a little bit of said yellow poo snuck out of the "leak proof diaper" onto my daughter's onesie near the poppers at her crotch. I scrubbed at it with a wipe and was pretty pleased with the results. Even my overly paranoid first-time-mother eyes could not detect the slightest mark on her onesie. Then I lifted her bottom up to put the new diaper underneath her, only to then find that the majority of her poo had, in fact, evaded her diaper completely and oozed its way up her back, leaving a fabulously enormous poo stain right above her diaper. Shit. Literally.

Good times, good times...

Every one has a good poo story, be it their own or that of their offspring. Please feel free to share, it won't gross me out. I've become strangely ambivalent towards excrement. It's great how one's standards can drop...

4 comments:

calencoriel said...

Two quick stories both involving the oldest. (When he was in infant form, of course)

1. Blue's Clues applesauce produces amazing colors in the poo

2. If your baby accidentally eats part of the newspaper(he was with the sitter at the time) the cellulose of the paper won't digest and you'll be able to "read" the poo. Yep...the word THE was clearly written right there on a turd in my kid's diaper.

Good times.

Anonymous said...

I remember especially one time when I was changing my son. Wipe-up and powdering had been successfully accomplished, and I was just preparing to close up the front of the diaper, when he cut loose with an immense load in pistachio green, while simultaneously firing high-speed pee over his shoulder and into the wall.

He's 24 now, and about to get married. The time of my revenge approaches.....

cicely

Forsoothsayer said...

well, u know how much i love poop. mabrouk on second offspring!

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