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Thursday, May 28, 2009

Pardon Me While I Slip Into Something More Embarrassing...

My science teacher was the unfortunate deliverer of the ultimate Freudian slip. Of cosmic proportions. I only wish I was there, but I was grateful for his sharing his humiliation with me. And thus the web.

He was teaching the students about sexually transmitted diseases and various ways in which they might be transmitted in the hopes of dispelling myths and old wives tales. Seriously, I had a student who was convinced that drinking a 2 liter of Mountain Dew after having sex would act as a morning after pill... Another thought that if the girl was standing up and jumped up and down afterwards there would be no fear of pregnancy either... Another thought that you could catch AIDS from toilet seats (maybe if you sat on a seat studded with broken glass right after a crack whore...) so they need all the dispelling they can get when it comes to sex.

Anyway, he was trying to explain how the membranes that line a woman's vagina is an awful lot like the lining of your mouth. What he TRIED to say next was that the nature of the lining of your mouth allows you experience the tastes of the food you eat and why "FOOD TASTES SO GOOD", but instead this is the gem that came out:

"... So the lining of your mouth is the same, which is why vaginas taste so good."

He later reflected with me that even though he had no idea of what he'd just said, he knew something was wrong when the kid in the back (aka Rip Van Winkle) actually lifted his drool covered face off of his desk and stared quizzically at his teacher. After some quiet giggling, a girl raised her hand and said "Do you know what you just said?" and proceeded to quote the statement back to him.

I told him that, on the bright side, if the kids run home to tell their parents what Mr. Science Teacher said, we'd have a great turn out of mothers to the next parent-teacher conference night and the worst he'd probably get is a few winks and giggles. 

I love seeing guys blush and this young man is going to be good for that, I can tell.


Bdubba said...

Dude, that is great. I wish I knew the identification of said Mr. Science teacher in order to envision it more clearly.

TeacherLady said...

You wouldn't know him, anyway... He's a new chap.

Bdubba said...

Awwww man. I was running through possible Bio guys and mentally creating pictures of their blood red faces. I think I would pay to see that Freudian slip by Mr. Anatomy guy though. lol

TeacherLady said...

HAHA! That would be priceless. I bet he's had a few of his own, but I don't get to work with him.

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