Whenever we've got kids failing a whole quarter, we have them fill out a form that asks them why they think they're failing and what they might do or need to remedy that... In response to why this one particular student may be failing, he responded that he "wasn't doing his assmints".
I'm suddenly reminded of the frequently used fake swear word on B3ta... "Cuntymints". What a great expletive. I must start using it in casual conversation with friends and strangers alike.