I am often so relieved when I choose to approach a situation with a little less aggression and a little more tact. As I ascended a staircase, I saw a guy and a girl chatting when they should have already been in class. They both looked at me awkwardly and as I started to say "get to class" I noticed the girl's eyes were red so I softened my "request" with a:
"I know you must have something serious you need to talk about, but you really should be getting to class."
They began to half-heartedly move off, but I knew it was just for show and was proven right when I descended the same stairs a moment or two later and they had just shifted to the landing. They promptly dispersed, so I made no further comment.
Later on, I see the same kid chatting to a different girl. This guy must be a serious Romeo! I later see the kid talking to the history teacher I work with and so asked him who the Don Juan is.
"Oh that's ... He's going to jail. I asked him why he came to school today when he could be with his family and he said 'dude! This is where the girls are!'..."
"What'd he do?!"
"I don't know. He just said five counts."
I know he made the decision to do whatever it was he did himself, but I'm glad I didn't make things even worse for him by being an ignorant doofus.